Two things in my life
have happened without me putting in any deliberations or thought-first
initiation into paintings and second initiation into spiritual quest. Both
these have occurred at two instances separated by a gap of seventeen years, the
first being in 1993 when I was posted at a high altitude area and the second in
2010 when I was posted in a naxal affected area.
Initiation into serious
art primarily was guided by my urge to be in a creative field. It also provided
me a second career option where I could enjoy freedom of existence which to a
large extent gets curbed in a serious profession of soldiery. As I painted on,
I discovered that I wanted to create something which our eyes do not see in the
course of their scanning the universe. Incessant experimentation with different
mediums and subjects was the hallmark of this phase which included my formal
education of art.
Second event i.e
initiation onto the path of spiritual quest resulted in change in my attitude
and vision of life. Nanak’s teachings
became my guide and his life my
inspiration. I was going beyond the street perception of life to seek
truth. Material gains started getting
relegated in my priorities. Canvas provided me a platform on which I could
visibly implement the tough calls I was taking while walking on the path. GOD-
my only guru, fearlessness and deeper
introspection were the main principles I was experimenting with. Hard work gave
me a sense of fulfilment and supported my quest. While on the path , with my
limited vision and very few grey cells in my skull, I got pushed into a clutter
and my life energy was struggling to break free into calmness. This struggle manifested
on my canvases and the resultant was existential feel oozing out of works.
When I look back and analyse, the stages of previous quarter
of a century of my life could be summarised as –
Initiation into painting > Initiation on to spiritual path >
Implementation of learning on canvas >Deeper quest with the canvas
responding.
Today, I present
myself not as a painter alone but a seeker for whom art has become inseparable from the path and life
itself. The gains expected from paintings are as nebulous as the resultant of
spiritual quest. No amount of riches hold any significance in my life.
Paintings give my life a meaning and a reason to exist.
Contrary to my earlier
belief that if pushed to choose, I would give up painting for spiritual quest, now I believe that my
existence is because of my paintings and spiritual quest the guiding
principles. I can not give up any. I paint, I exist. Spiritual quest has
acquired a tangible form in my works. I
feel that my works are not abstract but a
physical manifestation of my spiritual quest and hence very real. Therefore
they have a different appeal- though abstract in rendering they hide the real
me.
Meditation occurs for a seeker when he stands in front of my
works. I brand my paintings as ‘ Life enriching’.
GOD wants me to paint and hence has sent me to this world - #GOD #painthard #prayhard
